Monday, July 31, 2006

you know, simultaneously having sex with two beautiful women really isn't overrated.

Yeah; right!

"The Camera Doesn't Lie."

Sincere and utter bullshit. Cameras deceive, and easily.

Why, just look at this shot. Grainy, but decently exposed. It creates the wrongful impression that there was light in the room. And that the air was "red."
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It was as dark as a motherfucker, and the camera struggled to get even this. I struggled to avoid shake.

The shot also creates the impression that the artist was rocking.

Don't be deceived.

While I liked his set, it did not . . . rock.

And they may not be Christians -- I got the "cross by using the monitors as a framing device. Aren't i cool?

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eff me.

It was good music.

Celebrating Avedon

I'm not quite sure how he does it . . . did it.

Not quite sure what he did, for that matter.

Landing Strip

I fucked up while shaving, and missed a narrow band of my chin.

I have a landing strip on my chin. Keep yer heads down -- I fear a DC9 may try to land . . .

Get Well Soon, Michael O'Connor of Ellicott City, MD by way of The George Washington University

I like Michael O'Connor a lot; I think he's a crafty, heady southpaw. But I hear he's been ailing, and I know that he got roughed up on Saturday by the Nomar-less Dodgers.

get better, kid
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sir Isaac Newton didn't understand jackshit. . .

Matt Keating Was Good

I enjoyed seeing Matt Keating's set at the Velvet Lounge on Sunday night.

He was accompanied by a Jason Mercer on the double bass. I'm not a fan of the double bass in most rock venues; by the time it's amplified, there is no call for it. But Mr. Mercer used a bow on one song [mixing the bow with plucking, and adding to a nice arrangement]. His accompaniment was a welcome addition to the songs.
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Mr. Keating's use of the harmonica and a carefully-placed tambourine [for the all-important tambourine stomp] helped round out the sound, keeping things interesting as Mr. Keating took us through his psyche.

All in all, the roots that Mr. Keating is displaying seem to fit well. . .

Grahame's company was, as always, delightful.
when my alarm clock went off this morning, it was a real wake up call.

Sunday, July 30, 2006


What do these men have in common?

Intestinal Flu

Ouch . . .

Some Intestines

Ten years passes so quickly . . . .

jesus, it sounds like shit.

courtesy of sue's mom . . .

Trick Question

So, is Tom Cruise the greatest living actor, or what?

some people are assholes

it's always a painful experience to realize that certain people are assholes. people you love, people you forgive, people for whom you make excuses. you don't want it to be true, but it is. you can't change it.

i wonder if those people know.

i hope i'm not one of them.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Johnny Mac Provides Us Big Cock

Some day Cheezygoof will teach me how to import a YouTube video to this groovy Blogger/Blogspot world.

Anyway, until that happens, I urge you to click on this link to the video for the song "Real Man."

Johnny Mac informs me that the band Big Cock has unleashed itself on the world.

As the manager for Black Puss, i can promise you that a combo tour is in the offing!

Hmmm -- Cheezy; I think I figured it out!

Steve McQueen Advertises For Ford

That's The Life . . .

The Washington Post explains the joys of showering outside.

For those about to travel to the beach, I salute you!

My Favourite Coen Bros. Movie

Friday, July 28, 2006

Similarities and Differences

George michael and I have something in common: we've both had sex in a park.

The difference is that I had sex with a woman. But that shouldn't come between us.

Alice Cooper Changed My Life

Alice Cooper was my favourite band in the '70s and continues to bring me great pleasure.

Too Many Alices?

Jestaplero also married an Alice. He should avoid divorcing her, as it costs a ton of money.

Johnny Mac featured an Alice in his band -- she sang lead.

Alice was the subject of the Jefferson Airplane's White Rabbit, a bullshit song that should be ripped from the face of the earth.

I have now mentioned the name over ten times . . .
Alyce was very kind, and bought me a pair of Brooks Addiction Walker 4 shoes, size 12.5.

She is impatient with the dog.

She doesn't like swimming.

She is an alto.

She likes the Howard Stern show.

Here's Jacqui

I thought that this was in better taste than the naked pictures of Alyce -- who is, after all, the mother of my two daughters. . . .


It appears that Charles Barkley and I have something in common:

"I was a Republican until they lost their minds,"

he said.

Jesus Christ do I love that guy.

The story can be found by visiting the Washington Post online.


It's like a day spa on steroids . . .
This morning, we changed the format back to the black of days gone by. But then, a thought: "fuck it; I like the new layout. It's easier to read, and the other one is worn out." So it's shower appliques all the way . . .

Rolling Over In His Grave

"He Can Just Bite Me."

I think that Mike Brown could have grown to be a national hero, had he stayed in the limelight.

Naming Names

Somebody should have provided the name and description of the compelling website we recently linked to, which was discovered nearby: it's called If Charlie Parker Was a Gunslinger, There'd Be a Whole Lot of Dead Copycats. For the film nuts who lurk here -- you'll be challenged, and overjoyed by the photos. For the photo nuts who lurk here -- the banner begins with a Walker Evans quote, and Weegee, D. Arbus, and other photogrpahers are prominently featured, recurringly. Jazz and rock greats, most of a bygone -- not forgotten -- era, show up. And there's thoughtful discussion throughout. I think many of you will enjoy it a lot. I know I do.

A nEw Song

I've written a new song:

Bye Bye Day Spa, Bye Bye . . .
Iraq = boo boo

Thursday, July 27, 2006

The Greatest

THIS is the greatest website in the world.


Early Reviews Are In

Hmmmm -- let's see what Killer Chick says about the new format:

I am after all "killer" chick . . . and your blog space seems to have become a lavender thing with swirly designs that one usually encounters in a salon, or behind a cheezy (apologies to Cheezygoof) drawing of a, well, chick. Y'know the kind I'm talkin' 'bout?

It just doesn't strike me as very . . . mulish.

* * *

Posted by kc | Thursday, July 27, 2006 1:44:06 PM

She also said "Why do I get the feeling I've stumbled onto a link for a day spa?"

It doesn't seem to have gone over too well.

Hmmm -- as soon as I finish adding these appliques to my quilt, and rearrange my thong, I'll consider some changes . . .

btw -- also still dead

for mister parker and demanding chick

apologies to Blog Pimp

btw, still dead . . .

Happy Birthday, Juliana!!

The Disillusioned Right

David Broder'slatest column discusses the "simmering rage" in the GOP over the eff-headedness of the administration. Or, as I know them, "los payosos" ["the clowns"].

Your Entertainment Dollar at Work

I find it a little hard to believe that I can purchase a progressive scan DVD Player for less money than I would spend taking one daughter to the local theater for a "bargain matinee" showing of "You, Me, & Dupree."

But the experience of seeing a projected film [at 30 fps, that beautiful little flickering light giving rise to the word "flick"] in a darkened theater, and the experience of seeing it with many strangers, can't be surpassed by sitting in my home with my cheap DVD player.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

For Lance Bass

am i alone here, or does anyone else find jennifer aniston either unattractive or, at best, unnoteworthy? and does anyone not tire of the attention she receives?

which I



to . . .

now that's a sentence!

I may not go for the broads in the Victoria's Secret catalogues, but I'll take one'a these any day . . .

Ouch; Don't Stop !

Thank you to mister parker and his fine bride, who were kind enough to treat me to a most-excellent ball game last night.

Work has been more than a little overwhelming lately, and I'd lost touch with my beloved Nats.

The first pitch to a National is depicted in the photo -- Matt Morris came right after Soriano. Boswell suggests it was a message intended to cool down the red-hot Soriano [and the slightly-heating Nats].

mister parker and I have seen a master use the beanball to shut a team down [Nolan Ryan carressing Mike Devereaux's back at 97+ mph] -- nobody did jackshit after that purpose pitch. But Morris ain't Ryan, and these Nats ain't those Os.

Last night, the Nats rallied around Soriano, who is clearly the team MVP and likely the MACP [most-appreciated-clubhouse-presence type guy]; they beat the snot out of Morris.

Anyway -- the "new" RFK is still the same RFK. But the folks are friendlier, the food is fresher, and the poon tang is sweeter. . .

Sorry; I had a Lynchburg moment there.

RFK is nicer. And the racing Presidents made my night!

You can watch a ballgame for three bucks.

Hell, I charge mnyself three bucks to stand up.

What the hell does that mean?

Anyway, if they'd decapitated the woman who sang the anthem, it woulda been nigh perfect.

I hope I see a few more of these sweeties.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

I can't get a boner for the asian woman . . .
Hmmmm; another unintelligible post from yourts truly...

Signing Statements

About a year ago, I had a conversation, lush with legal geekery, about Presidential "signing statements." At the time, I blithely criticized "legislative history," describing it as a poor determinant of the scope or applicability of a law; Congress voted on the law, not what one member said [or even one House or Senate report said], and resort to the legislative history should be the last resort. I also opined that I didn't have a big problem with presidential signing statements; the executive had just as much right to offer an opinion of what a law means as the legislature, I thought. What the law actually says should determine what it means, and looking behind the language should only occur when the language is ambiguous and unintelligble. And courts should effectively demand that laws be written to be understood.

I'm not sure any of that is wrong.

But the use of a signing statement by the President to sidestep a veto, and then declare that a law is "inapplicable" is a perversion of our system of government. The New York Times
editorial on the topic makes a few good points, and Sen. Specter's upcoming bill to sue the President is the right thing for the legislature to do. NOT because they get to be the sole determiner [see how I used the variant appropriately?] of what the law says -- the executive gets a say, and the judiciary gets THE say -- but because the Constitution directs a president who does not approve of a law to veto it, and suffer the appropriate political fate.

This $#%^$#!% wants everything both ways!!!!!! GodDAMMIT, do they drive everyone away?

[well, no; but don't fuck with my rhetorical flourish.]

More on proactive

Well, let's see . . .

First of all, Brian Garner's Garner's Modern American Usage, an admirable book, recognizes that "proactive" is a "Vogue Word" [a linguistic fad, sometimes working at a subconscious level. Vogue words are commonly used by speakers to make a statement about themselves or identify themselves in some way (apart from the meritorious use of the word)]. He also acknowledges, though, that "proactive" is "occasionally useful as an antonym of reactive. It seems to fill a gap in the language -- one not adequately filled by assertive or any other common word." This point has been made by the Jestaplero in his defense of "proactive."

Garner also discusses another word that, surprisingly, has been defined in an overly restrictive way -- obviate. And I would urge everyone to consider its use to avoid some uses of "be proactive" [or, I would argue, the synonymous "act"]. As Garner explains:

Some modern dictionaries define obviate as meaning "to make unnecessary." And some writers actually use the word this way -- e.g. "Volunteering does not, I repeat does not, obviate government's role in providing social services" [citation omitted].

But that definition is unduly restrictive. In fact, the OED doesn't even list this sense. Obviate more usually means "to meet and dispose of or do away with (a thing); to prevent by anticipatory measures." * * *

So. I urge us all, when arguing that someone should "be proactive" in disposing of something, that we might counsel that someone should obviate whatever they're dealing with.

*This*, my friends, is *sure* to make someone sound natural and normal in their speech, avoiding the tickle caused by proactive.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Why is it that people who can't write insist on editing the work of, oh, I don't know -- other people? I don't mean other people who can't write in the manner that yours truly can't write: overwrought, compound sentences that contain too many ideas, poorly expressed.

I mean people who can't distinguish "which" from "that," or people who don't have a clue when a comma should be used to set off a modifying phrase.

Do they insist on editing just to piss me off?

Intelligent Design

Thank you thank you thank you.

I've had trouble playing [lack of talent and practice], but not trouble staying in tune . . .

Shitty Headline

This, from the New York Times, is just a shitty headline:

Israel Weighs Foreign Troops on Border
Israeli officials expressed interest in a multinational armed force as the military again pounded southern Lebanon from the air and ground and Hezbollah rockets hit northern Israel.

What, did they come in at sixteen stone?
Iraq = Boo Boo
Not much posting last week.

Very, very busy at work.

This war in Lebanon ["police action"] is getting me down.

A Lebanese friend in AA ran out of a meeting crying.

Damned Iranians. . .

Complicated topic.

Unanticipated Benefits

One of the unanticipated benefits of the cessation of drinking alcohol has been a return to "normal" sleep habits. Indeed, for the first time in my life [that I can recall], I really love sleep, and I don't feel like I'm "missing out on the world." I kinda feel like I'm pulling one over on the world, if you know what I mean ["ohmigod, I actually get to sleep!"].

An ancillary benefit has been that I forgot just how many infomercials Girls Gone Wild plasters on the air from about 3:30 to 5:00 am. Don't get me wrong, I'm a wuss, but I'm not gay or nothing -- I like naked broads a whole bunch. But the loser "hotties" doing their juvenile posing for Girls Gone Wild always bugged the shit out of me. I'm glad I forgot that they're out there . . .

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Thank You

I am very thankful that I was lovingly taught to love oysters on the halfshell.

In the last year, my lone departure from strict vegetarianism was the enjoyment of a few big, beautiful oysters at the Borgata . . . .

I mean, oysters are no broccoli, but they're damned fine!

Look Out, Mets!!!

Look out, Mets! If the Nats go on a 17-game winning streak, and the Mets, Braves, Phillies, and Marlins each go on a 17-game losing streak [which is sort of impossible, seeing as how the teams play each other], the Nats'll be right back in this thing!

Saturday, July 22, 2006

at least six
i own many Hamers

Hail Ms. Lane!

My goodness, what an attractive woman!

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Freedom of Choice

It occurs to me that maybe being celibate would be better if it were just an option . . .

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

I Can't Believe They . . . . .

The Washington Post is cool enough and kind enough, or thoughtful enough, or greedy enough, to put together e-mail on a HOST of topics of interest to its readers. If you're a Nats fan, they'll send you Boswell's e-mail analysis. If you love music, they'll e-mail you tips on upcoming shows. etc. etc.

Despite being largely homebound the last few years, I subsrcibe to an e-mail newsletter the post puts together on travel.

Today's big articles: .Wine touring in Saint-Emilion in Bordeaux, and Whisky TrailsWhisky Trails in Scotland in the online Travel Q&A.

Goddammit, I can't believe they would send that kind of an e-mail to an alcoho. . . . oh, that joke is,


Question for you Windows / Explorer users

If you visit some of those videos I loaded onto my web pages,

yer pal,
tech boy

Question for you Windows / Explorer users

If you visit some of those videos I loaded onto my web pages,

like kiss yourself are you able to

see the text?

access the video?

play the video?

I know some of you use dial-up, and the eternal load makes it impossible. But for broadband folks -- can you see the stuff?

My work Explorer provides me no access; stuff shows up, then is "covered up" and is invisble.

yer pal,
tech boy

Monday, July 17, 2006


forgot these two

thanks for the reminder, mister parker

Ze Poll

Zo, I am interested -- whom among you is likely to vote for one of these people? Who gets you excited (of this bunch)? Offends you?